“Haye Jawaani”

Gayatri’s been a dutiful offspring, getting high grades throughout school, staying focused during college- professors love her. And now, Gayatri darling is on her way to do further studies. What’s more, is that she’s been offered a 2 year contract with one of the top 5 Consultancy Firms in the country!

Good on you Gayatri! Us ‘Aunties’ and ‘Uncles’ believe that you couldn’t have achieved anything if you were like other ”kids”-with their boyfriends and partying and all. Chhee chhee! 

In order to be successful, girls have to be asexual.

No one will talk about the probability that so-and-so’s daughter  might just be really interested in her subjects, a multi-tasker, or naturally gifted so she found tests piss easy. They will revel in the notion that she had no ‘distractions’ and a clean, studious mind that didn’t waver, or get influenced.

The ‘No-Boys’ policy gets passed down as a legacy, from parent to daughter. In most households when girls are ‘of age’ and growing up to be pretty young things they must be barb-wired, for they can fall into bad hands. Their minds should revolve around studying and ‘getting ahead’. In college, there is a situation of  freedom meshed with a fully developed exterior. But again girls will be reminded that their mental state is not at par with their physical form. They must wait, and purge themselves of such thoughts, since “Now’s not the time for all of this”. The incentive ? Well, one day when they get a top class salary, all boys will be waiting in line for them to pick and choose from.

Wowie. And when exactly will that happen?
Oh when you’re at the marriage-perfect age of 25-30 of course!

So, while our bodies are developed and , according to nature, ‘ready’ we have to train ourselves to stay away from its demands and needs, when we are at our hormonal peak, only desensitize ourselves. By the time this happens -when we have learnt to ignore our bodies’ signals and alarms, we are expected to be interested in spending our lives with a male, to basically thrive in married life and procreate, when we are so over it! Where is the sense? I don’t know!

And to top it off, while I was on my road trip across Uttar Pradesh (so awesome, I can’t wait to do it again) I was totally immersed with countless songs about women’s ‘Jawaani’ (जवानी ). According to my Oxford Hindi-English dictionary, ‘Jawaani’ means early adulthood or adolescence….Yup.
So how many songs have there been about this?

(click on the links to listen)

Sheila Ki Jawani  Ye Jawani Hai Diwani Jawani Zindabad Jawani Jan E Man Jawani Diwani  Meri Jawani Pyar Ko Tarse  Meri Jawani Teri Diwani Meri Jawani  Chardi Jawani Teri Jawani Badi Mast Mast Hai   Ek Jawani Teri Ek Jawani  Jawani Tera Bol Bala  Mohabbat Ka Haath Jawani Ka Palla Jawani O Diwani Tu Zindabad  Baba Meri Yeh Jawani  Teri Yeh Jawani  Jawani Jawani Jalti Hai Jawani   Yeh Jawani Yeh Haseen Raat Jawani Ki Rail Kahin Chhoot Na Jaye  Nachdi Jawani  Teri Mast Jawani  Rabba De De Jawani   Chamki Jawaani Yeh Jawani Hadh Kar De Nachdi Jawani  Do Din Ki Jawani  Jawani Se Ab Jung Jale Jale Jawani Meri Channa Jawani  second hand jawaani
That’s not the end of the list! There is more, so much more. Why can’t we all just stop obsessing about this, and leave people alone to do what they want. People, especially girls, are capable of making decisions, becoming successful even if they date or have relationships. 
 
 

3 thoughts on ““Haye Jawaani”

  1. You forgot to add my favourite “Ni tu hune hune hoyi mutiyaar
    Mundeyan ton bach ke rahi”. 😀 You are correct, we do live in a pathetic society where girls are treated like that! And the situation is getting worse day by day. It’s like instead of going forward, we are going back in time (mentally). I just hope they don’t start that Sati crap again in the future.

  2. To abstain and to marry at the right age is much better than wasting your ‘ Jawani’ and career in your twenties . Then trying to piece together your life in your thirties. After you have wasted the best part of it just fooling around and being a slut (male or female). Relationships , responsibilities, commitments , seriousness, accountability. These are all very important human qualities. People who are brave enough to grow up from boys/girls to men/women take the responsibility of putting their lives in proper order and developing themselves as a person. These people have kids at the right age. Give them a stable home , upbringing and values. These people are the pillars of a strong responsible society. Its easy to mock their commitment and seriousness towards life by comparing them to the secondhand , borrowed , outdated notions of ‘coolness’ from the american culture. ‘Coolness’ AHOY ! Dumbness AHOY ! Blondness AHOY !

    1. How very insightful of you Mr. Mishra. Thank you for your views. I think it’s so interesting how you deduced that my post was all about young people having sex (which is so American- since only people in America have sex, apparently- oh and blondes and dumb people!). Nobody’s mocking anyone who instructs their child that they are incapable of having a relationship albeit a stable or sexual one. That is very healthy upbringing indeed. They, after all, hone such pure chaste values in their ‘child’ so that at the “right time”, which is what… before 30 (the expiry date) they can have children and get married. That is the correct way of life. All our forefathers and mothers have been right all along. That’s why men and women have such healthy exchanges in our nation, like all over! Yippee. Patriarchy AHOY! Backwardness AHOY! Moral-Familial Policing AHOY!

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